March madness.....

Hello, dear blog! Hope you are doing good, having a few stray visitors now and then :) Busy with the regular stuff, year-end exams, visit to RPO amongst other things and it's taken me a long time to complete a blog post.

Objectively speaking, this lack of focus could be due to the weird multi-tasking I do from time to time in spite of swearing off it. For instance, earlier I would kind of dwell on blog posts I could write while  walking in the park, now with this imposed multi-tasking I am chanting the "Gayathri Mantra" during my perambulations of the walking path, so back home, post bathing, when I light the morning diya I am done quicker. As I read what I've written it strikes me as preposterous, the things we do, and a rolling eye emoji would be very appropriate :D

The time has come when a way of life is going to end and am trying to make the most of it. Here is a link to a blogpost which dwells on this theme so well - it is sheer poetry in prose and touching too by greatbong.  I wish my writing could even emote half as that. There are so many things which I want to/should be doing in the few more months of stay here... But I go about it in a languorous pace, slow and uncertain, that I am sure I will leave some stuff undone. Meeting up with people is a part of this - but its March, everyone is busy with exams, vacations and the temperatures in the city instill an additional layer of lassitude to most activities. And in my case it would be a hi and bye at the same time, tough, right?

I make sure I visit at least one of the 4 mini forests close by for my walks. Each one of them is suited for different moods. The one closest to home is when I am short of time but must not miss the walk. The second down the line does not have a cemented walking path and is greener than the first. Also it is slightly bigger so I can walk around more and its closer to all the vegetable sellers that line the road. There is one soppu seller (greens seller) who has been educating me very patiently on the names of different greens. I must try out gongura and moringa once at least.

The third one is usually more crowded thanks to the play park and I don't frequent it often, what with bonnet macaques swinging off the branches overhead. The last one is my favourite as it has the biggest walking track, greenest canopy and walking the usual number of rounds (yes - I am number partial) translates to covering more ground. Also, it has  a more diverse set of walkers/joggers there and I get my mix of people watching too. A total win-win. If I am in the mood for a walk-jog, something which I have not done for a while now, it is there that I can do it most un-selfconsciously.

It's not just me who feels about the mini-forests so strongly. In an area dotted with 30*40, 50*80 sites and apartment complexes, these tree-lined green open spaces are the lungs of this area and have visitors all throughout the day. And everyone - right from the people who stay in this area, the school kids who come to play in the play areas, the morning, afternoon, evening fitness enthusiasts, birds, dogs and monkeys, the bees, butterflies, office goers, impromptu visitors - anyone who has ever sat for 2 mins on the parks' benches would probably be grateful for their existence. I shall miss this with a vehemence I cannot explain.

Writing has literally come down to a standstill. With my last freelancing assignment where I was not paid on time, with a lag of 2 months and the organisation unresponsive I have decided I will not work with them again. Contacted the content head and all she has to say is "wait for 2 months".Would they treat employees like that.

Content as an industry is exploitative to content creators unless and until one has bargaining power and can negotiate well. Not everyone can write well but it is sort of an easy thing to do, so that brings a great influx and then people accept any kind of remuneration to the extent of writing free, some do it  for visibility (to each his own). A new app launch for Moms community contacted me and they did not exactly want me to write for free, but could not pay market rates either and the conversation ended with "do let us know, even a single post will do". Good content, relevant content needs time, research and craft and I can only imagine how tough it would be for those wanting to consider this as a full-time job.

Schools get over next week and since we have decided to go back, not paid fees for the new session or looked at mails over uniforms, books etc. The WA groups for each of the kids' class has been a good place to keep in touch with other parents. No oversharing, confined to exchanging of pertinent info and at the same time helped alleviate some amount of social isolation I have felt due to lack of friends. Summer vacations will be spent with my parents, and this could be the last summer we spend in this manner, esp. given Mom's condition.

I often feel I don't spend too much time deliberating over it, but I am increasingly conscious that each interaction now is that much more loaded and final and a case of there will not be ever again. Eyes suffuse with tears and the heart aches, and then again life's demands jolt me out of this reverie. I can't imagine not hearing her voice when I call her morning and evening. Or how we just talk about our days, the kids and .... how can anything in the world replace a Mother? How does anyone ever get over it? But while she is here we do not want to dwell on the finality of things to come and so between father, bro and me we do not discuss this much. Stoic acceptance.

Kids are very excited about the summer and Hubli still retains that spell over me....all memories of childhood summers spent there, Perhaps I will pen my next post from there. Or I may comeback to write about a lot of stuff I have not touched on. The mystery of life is so fascinating, so unexpected, so agonizing too....and yet the sun rises every single day. Until the next time....