All about nothingness


Source: Google Images

It dawns on you like the cold November wind
At times when you take reprieve from your routine
You can't seem to shake off that feeling of despair, of being inconsequential
A ghost stares back at you from the mirror, didn't you see the caustic smile?

The times when you want to say something, but lack coherency in thoughts,
You don't want to say something, anything,  as retracting spoken words is a messy job,
Time marches on, and you try to lift your legs and move forwards from the quicksand of forgotteness
You mime moving ahead, but you remain stuck in the bog of inaction and uncertainity

You are seemingly calm, normal, attentive and caring, even loving
Going through the motions of normalcy...almost
Anything can ruffle the calm exterior... a lost key, spilt milk, a mild rebuke, stress of a long drive
You explode - your anger (more so dissappointment with yourself) splashes all over like the molten lava of a disturbed Vesuvius

Gaping holes in the tapestry of loving and kindness you've worked on
All at once the realisation dawns
This is not the frequency you ought to be operating from

Certain nerve impulses and connections are rapidly restored
Some emotions and thoughts pushed to temporary hold
And you resort to regular programming

Appearance and face value is what matters here
You even apologize for the apparent malfunction, it is only human
Normalcy is increasingly dysfunctional ... like pushing things under the carpet

You keep your nothingness at bay, make an attempt at least
But it can descend on you unawares
Taking away in its wake all the colours of the fall.

Comments

  1. Gauri Trivedi5 November 2013 at 19:18

    loved your writing....fall does this to me too!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Chatty Wren6 November 2013 at 07:22

    Thank you! Yes, it can be beautiful and bleak both!

    ReplyDelete
  3. pankti6 November 2013 at 13:25

    Hey Hugs...i am totally with you on this..

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Chatty Wren6 November 2013 at 16:27

      Thanks! Inspired by a long bout of depressing weather:)

      Delete
  4. Divya7 November 2013 at 01:05

    I LOVED IT! I am at a place right now where I can totally relate to what is being said between the lines - even if your interpretation is nowhere the same as mine, I am just thankful to have someone echoing what I believe to be my thoughts and the way I feel :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Chatty Wren7 November 2013 at 09:57

      Thanks Divya! I hope you are feeling better now! I guess that is the fun part of interpretation - to each his own!

      Delete

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